Monday, March 9, 2009

On Tough Times

So I'm here, but just a tired, busy version of myself. We're at the very end of our basement renovation, which has been a flurry of activity, people coming in and out of the house, and decision-making. It's been wonderful and exciting to see this totally useless space transformed into something beautiful (don't worry... Ben and I have mad before and after photos that I'll post this week as soon as we're actually 'done'), but it leaves me feeling worn. I'm definitely nesting like crazy, something that I don't think I ever fully experienced with Zosia-- but apparently building a nest is hard work and very tiring. I'm really looking forward to the end of this week, which I am hoping will herald in a couple weeks of peace and normalcy before this little munchkin arrives.

A week ago I discovered a wonderful new blog Via Media (on the side-bar here). The author is a Catholic writer, mother of five, who tragically lost her husband a few weeks ago. Her blog is interesting, but also a very thoughtful examination of what it feels like to lose someone so beloved to you. The other day she wrote
Well, that is the point of experience. Part of the point. We understand, we grow in empathy, we see pieces of our own lives in the lives of others, of our hurt in their own eyes, and through that suffering, we learn how to love.
I have never experienced something as heartwrenching as Amy, but her comment above somehow rung so true with me. These days at times I feel overwhelmed, exhausted, and pooped, but in my heart I know that all of these experiences are only opening me up to the experiences of others, and making me more able to love them in their own place of suffering.

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